Dealing with the Imminent Death of a Loved One - Caring for a Dying Person
Kathryn Patricelli, MAProviding care for a dying person can be very difficult and emotional, and yet also a rewarding experience. There are many challenges that you are likely to face as you work to make the dying person comfortable and assist with any unfinished tasks that the dying person wishes to accomplish.
One of the most important things to remember is that you need to take care of yourself in addition to caring for the dying person. This will be a stressful and trying time and if you aren't able to take care of yourself (getting enough rest, food, exercise, etc), you won't be able to provide quality care to your patient either. You need to monitor your own emotions and seek outside or professional help if necessary, should you find yourself overcome by anxiety, fear, guilt, anger, depression, or other powerful feelings that may threaten to temporarily overwhelm you. This also includes asking for help from other family members when this is needed and/or allowing others to help you when they offer. If you try to do everything on your own, you will quickly burn-out and not be able to provide good care.
It is important to continue to communicate with the dying person about their condition as much as possible. Allowing the person to have a say in how they are cared for whenever possible is an important gift you can provide them. Doing so helps the dying person to maintain a sense of independence and dignity, particularly in the face of their ultimate loss of control over a medical disease or condition that will end their lives. In addition to providing good physical care, it is also good to encourage the dying person to share his or her feelings, not only about physical symptoms, but also about emotional and spiritual concerns. Let the dying person know you are available and there to support him or her.
You'll need to work closely with the other health care professionals and caregivers involved in the caregiving process (such as other family members, doctors, nurses, aides, and spiritual advisors) in order to help coordinate the flow of information to all concerned parties. This communications task can include monitoring the dying person's level of physical comfort and emotional health, and letting others know when they need to become more involved. Partnering with other caregivers helps you to become more educated about what to expect over the course of a disease and during the final days. Asking lots of questions can help reduce some of the stress, anxiety and fear that you may be feeling about managing in the final days.
You can also help the dying person to finish any incomplete business he or she may have, including legal or financial matters, making reconciliations or amends, coordinating specific visitors, or even facilitating travel to special places. Providing such aid can involve a great deal of coordination and handling of many details, but can go a long way in allowing the person to die a "good death."
Signs and Symptoms of Approaching Death
Resources
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Articles
- Introduction to Death & Dying
- Planning for & Dealing with Your Own Imminent Death
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Signs of Approaching Death & Types of Care
- Signs and Symptoms of Approaching Death
- Dealing with the Imminent Death of a Loved One - Caring for a Dying Person
- Types of Care Available to Those Who Are Dying
- Heroic Measures to Prevent Death
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Dealing with a Loved One's Imminent Death
- Making Peace with a Loved One's Imminent Death
- Dealing With Your Loved One's Imminent Death - Preparations and Activities
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After a Death
- After the Death
- Funeral and Burial
- How to Behave at a Service and During the Grieving Period
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Grief & Bereavement Issues
- Grief
- Symptoms of Grief
- Factors Influencing the Grief/Bereavement Process - Unexpected Death Vs. Expected Death
- Factors Influencing the Grief/Bereavement Process - Helping Children Grieve
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Death & Dying Special Issues and Resources
- Special Issues Related To Death And Dying - Euthanasia
- Death and Dying Conclusion and Resources
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Questions and Answers
- Change of Heart After Parent's Death
- General Anxiety
- Longing For My Son
- My Dead Mother Haunts My Dreams
- Sudden Loss
- Trauma/Tragedy
- A Recent Loss
- The Grass is Always Greener...
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Book & Media Reviews
- A Commonsense Book of Death
- At the End of Words
- Before and After Loss
- Before I Die
- Being with Dying
- Beyond Goodbye
- Bodies in Motion and at Rest
- Crispin
- Death
- Death Benefits
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44 more
- Death in the Classroom
- Death Is That Man Taking Names
- Death of a Parent
- Ecstasy
- Erasing Death
- Ethical Wills
- Extreme Measures
- Facing Death: Elisabeth Kubler-Ross
- Going Through Hell Without Help From Above
- Graceful Exits
- Healing Conversations
- I Wasn't Ready to Say Goodbye
- Immortal Remains
- In Love With Life
- Into the Gray Zone
- Learning to Fall
- Let's Talk About Death
- Liberating Losses
- Losing Mum and Pup
- Loss
- Love, Aubrey
- Michael Rosen's Sad Book
- Mortal Dilemmas
- Murder in the Inn
- Olive's Ocean
- On Life After Death
- Peaceful Death, Joyful Rebirth
- Planning for Uncertainty
- Saving Grace
- Suffering, Death, and Identity
- Sunset Story
- The Awakening
- The Bright Hour
- The Color of Absence
- The Lovely Bones
- The Miracle
- The Modern Art of Dying
- The Other Side of Sadness
- The Suicide Tourist
- The Travelers
- To Die Well
- What Dying People Want
- When Breath Becomes Air
- Young@Heart
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Links
- [4] Associations
- [8] Information
- [1] Journals
- [1] Services
- [17] Videos
- [1] Blogs
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Videos
- Talking to Our Kids With Autism Spectrum Disorder About Death
- The Difference Between Hospice and Palliative Care
- Advance Directives
- Palliative Care Often Misunderstood
- Advanced Directives
- The Importance of Advanced Directives
- How to Set Up an Advance Healthcare Directive
- The Journey of Palliative Care: Putting Quality Back Into Life
- Planning Ahead with Advanced Directives
- Complicated Grief: Q & A with Dr. M. Katherine Shear
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7 more
- Understanding Hospice Care
- Planning for End-of-Life
- Grief through a Child's Eyes
- Palliative Care: Who is it For, What Does it Do, Why Should I Want it and When?
- What Really Matters at the End of Life
- Talking About Death Won’t Kill You
- When to Create a Living Will
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More Information
- Wise Counsel Interview Transcript: An Interview with Irvin Yalom, MD on Death Anxiety
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