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Relationship Problems

Ask Anne: Relationship Advice
Ask Anne
Relationship Questions

Unfaithful and Unhappy

It's a great relief to find your advice section. I'm so confused because there are so many things that are going wrong in my life and I don't know which one I should deal with first or how to even start. I'm 33 yrs. old, married for 13 yrs. with 2 children. My husband is 10 yrs. my senior. He's a very good provider, but throughout our married life he's never been faithful to me. He's been in and out of affairs which I unwillingly tolerated, because I don't have the means to support myself and my children. To cope with my dissatisfaction/frustration with my marriage, I spent my time going out with my peers drinking, hanging out in bars and lately, drugs. I've been in and out of affairs too. At present, the man I'm going out with is jobless, separated, a drug user, but swears he loves me. I'm starting to feel unhappy with our situation because I'm the one spending. Each time I tell him to find a job, he either ignores me or tells me to give him time. We've been on for almost a year now, and all he does is drink and bum around. I feel that I love him too, but I'm unhappy. What do I do? He sometimes threatens that he won't let me leave him. Three years ago I sought the help of a psychiatrist, and I was diagnosed to have mild depression. I got well, but then it kept on recurring, because I can't resist the temptation of doing drugs. Sometimes I feel I'm a hopeless case because there have been so many unfortunate events in my life. Most of the time I struggle just to keep my sanity.

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Disclaimer

  • 'Anne' is the pseudonym for the individual who writes this relationship advice column.
  • 'Anne' bases her responses on her personal experiences and not on professional training or study. She does not represent herself to be a psychologist, therapist, counselor or professional helper of any sort. Her responses are offered from the perspective of a friend or mentor only.
  • Anne intends her responses to provide general information to the readership of this website; answers should not be understood to be specific advice intended for any particular individual(s).
  • Questions submitted to this column are not guaranteed to receive responses.
  • No correspondence takes place.
  • No ongoing relationship of any sort (including but not limited to any form of professional relationship) is implied or offered by 'Anne' to people submitting questions.
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  • Always consult with your psychotherapist, physician, or psychiatrist first before changing any aspect of your treatment regimen. Do not stop your medication or change the dose of your medication without first consulting with your physician.

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